Sounding Good

“Jamie….I just had to stop and write you to thank you for passing on this CD.  I have been using it when driving in lots of traffic, doing bookwork (ugh) and even at work for my clients, they aren’t even aware that they are de-stressing, just that they feel good.  And also when I am at the dentist…..i would rather be giving birth then be there.  It is wonderful and it works!”

I just received this email today from someone who had purchased the yoga subliminal CD for stress release from me in a recent group order.  I didn’t make the CD but have used the all 6 of my the subliminal CD’s myself with lovely results.  It reminds me today of what I love about about much of the Kundalini music…the simplicity of the power of the sound. 

Not only can mantras, sound waves, literally change the channel of your brain frequency and shift your energy state , but it is also a space to connect to your Infinite Self (in whatever way you choose to call the universal connection).  Music in all shapes and form can change a mood, lift one’s spirit, and make one feel closer to God.  At a dinner party tonight, a couple said that their main mode of connecting spiritually was through music…in their case, with spiritual music through singing with choirs. 

I often use yogic music to work behind the scenes in my everyday life to keep me connected.  It’s part of how I stay in my space of yoga while cooking, cleaning, and working on my computer.   Yet there comes a time when I need to stop the background multi-tasking and put my focus front and center.  Which is why I’m so grateful for the 1000 day meditation I’ve committed to for the moment.  Eleven minutes each day I step outside my daily life and connect in with the melody of Nirinjan Kaur.  At times I resist having to stop what I’m doing, but it is these short eleven minutes that I create the pause I need to re-align my energies, that serve as my counter balance, that keep me sane.  The benefit, besides staying grounded and in balance, is that I can actually get more done better!  As a multi-tasker, I admit I do love this aspect.

What are you listening to to shift your energies?

Allowing the Best even when it’s “Imperfect”

I had a lovely opportunity this week to be reminded of the idea of doing my best in each moment even though it might seem “imperfect”.  I don’t truly consider myself a perfectionist but I admit to having some minor tendencies in that direction!  My clarification around this showed up in regards to marketing material I’m creating for my “Total Self Mastery” program which teaches individuals how to understand and use the language of the BodyMind in order to hear their inner wisdom and move them into the space of health and harmony (http://www.jamiedurner.com/tsm.htm).

I know what I teach.  I’m passionate about sharing the information and know the powerful results people gain.  But, while I may be well versed in the language of the BodyMind, I’m still developing my skills in the language of marketing…and I don’t have the passion for marketing like I do for my own work.  After being in a space of frustration and overload for about 24 hours, I realized I was making myself sick…literally.  I was experiencing tightness in my stomach, tension in my neck and shoulders, a headache, and a ramped up level of energy that felt manic and unsettling.  As usual, my physical cues allowed me to pause, take a deep breath, and step back to assess this mini hole I had dug myself into.

With the help of my two mastermind buddies, I was able to switch into the space of knowing I was doing the best I could for this moment, trust that the people who need to connect to my materials in this moment will, and open to allowing these marketing pieces to be a stage along my learning journey.  It is exactly the process I use in communicating with my BodyMind and how I view my personal journey of balance, so how funny that I was having some challenge putting this process into action within the sphere of marketing.

I knew I was on the right track when I read my morning yoga quote today by Yogi Bhajan who said, “Learn to listen to others and yourself quietly.  The moment you do not quietly listen to your own self, it is natural that you will become anxious.  Your strength is not in your wealth or your degrees.  your strength is only in how calmly, quietly and peacefully you can face the consequences.”

Another deep breath today followed by a yoga set for “Relaxation and Releasing Fear” and I am ready to face the consequences again…with a lighter heart, a calm stomach, and an ease in my body.

The Mystery of Buzzing in the Mouth

*Client Case Study – name has been switched to honor confidentiality*

My client Mary, has been coming in for several months.  The initial symptoms for the visits, which were moderate severe pain in the abdomen and poor sleep, have long since been resolved which is a whole different story.  Lately, this client has had a buzzing in the mouth, especially the upper jaw.  Although there had been some actual pain at one point, we had worked through the pain but this buzzing followed and continues to appear intermittently.  additionally, today she had some actual soft tissue discomfort in the gum and cheek area.  We decided to explore below the surface today and discovered some great treasures.

I used the rhythm of the craniosacral system to guide me to where we needed to start our work and was led by the body to the sacrum…interesting from the surface since that’s seems to have no connection with the jaw but do read on.    There was greater restriction on the left side of the sacrum in general.  I offered up to Mary that the sacral area is connected to the 1st chakra which has to do with core survival instincts and the physical body.  Mary has recently started a new job and we checked in with whether anything was feeling connected in that area.  There was some acknowledgment that she was still learning new habits for the job and wasn’t feeling fully settled which is uncomfortable for her.  Habits are also part of the 1st chakra realm.  She also began to speak of her daughter big coming of age event which was causing Mary some additional tension and also affected her daily rhythms as she was staying up late at night to do connected tasks.

At this point, her sacral area softened and I moved up to her chest and shoulders.  She began to speak more about her 12 year old daughter and some of the changes taking place in their relationship as her daughter got closer to the teen mark.   I also invited Mary to describe how mouth  felt.  The buzzing was clarified to be not pain but more of an annoying disruption.  The inner mouth gum area was taut and lacking flow of blood and generally felt unhealthy.

The more we explored, the more energy I felt coming from the left area of the chest and shoulder.  I shared this information along with the fact that the left side of the body is connected to the right brain which is our emotional energy.  Long story short…she realized that she was struggling some with the separation issue that was occurring as part of the natural development of her daughter, and was trying to find a way to feel supportive and valued yet allow her daughter the space to make her own choices and mistakes.   Their conversations wasn’t feeling very flowing and open these days nor very soft and warm.  In fact, her daughter was withdrawn, not speaking much, and doing more passive aggressive behavior.  The mouth, the area commonly associated with speaking, was reflecting the lack of flow, inflexible, and unhealthy feeling in her relationship with her daughter.

Three parts of the body presented themselves to reveal : shifting in rhythms and changes in the foundational structure of a relationship; emotional intensity at the heart level which is where we connect our own identity with another; and the mouth reflecting the connection of communication.  All three pieces when put together, drew a complete picture which resonated with where Mary was at.

 May chose, as her inspired actions for the day, to have a conversation with her daughter this afternoon regarding a long term homework project to be balanced with weekend activities in a way that provided more options and choice for her daughter to make.  She also stepped into the space of acknowledgment that the change in the relationship feels awkward and uncomfortable and that she doesn’t have the answers at the moment which she doesn’t like.  For today, just accepting where she is at felt empowering and like a good first step.  She made the decision to further support the process with her daughter to do another 2 coaching sessions so that she can find some answers within herself about how she would like her role to be and which elements in their relationship are her own issues that she wants to clarify and reclaim so that she can support her daughter’s independence and growth with greater ease.

Thank you, Mary, for allowing us to witness your courage along the big journey of motherhood!

A Wake Up Call, Creative Thinking, & A Plan in Action

The universe gave me several nudges this week towards another wake up call that led to an amazing aha.    As I’ve become more of an expert in communicating with my BodyMind, this aha was quickly  followed by inspired action that is in motion even as I write.  And I’d love to share today’s journey with you because it is exactly what my facilitation as a BodyMind Coach is all about and I want you to be able to have the same successful dialogues.

My aha this week is that where my passion is and my energy is flowing isn’t aligned completely with my real life and actions.  Basically, my passion and energy is surrounding my work as a BodyMind Coach and, specifically at this moment in the time, around creating my new program, Healing and Harmony from the Inside Out.  While I have completed the first stages of the program, including teaching it, there is still more I’m doing to refine it and bring it out to a larger audience.  And the crux is that I don’t seem to have enough time…rather, I don’t have the time to devote to the project and development because I am also juggling my householder tasks, seeing clients, and taking care of myself.

Now, all of those aspects are important, but not all of them are my energetic priority.  For this year, which I really saw yesterday, finishing the development of my program and all the business infrastructure that comes with it, is my TOP PRIORITY!  There, I’ve claimed it.  So what’ s the problem?  Well, those other pieces of my life which seem like a necessity, are getting in the way of me putting my full energy behind my priority.  And sometimes this is life…we have to juggle multiple pieces and don’t have the choice to focus on something exclusively.

However, as a creative thinker and believer of the big ANDs in life, I decided that the current reality wasn’t acceptable to me.  I decided that I needed a sponsor for a 6 month sabbatical from my active practice so that I could devote the majority of my time and energy to the project which is calling my soul.  The idea of a sabbatical was my first inspired action…more of an inspired idea I suppose.  So, great idea but now what?

As I am a woman of action, I decided that while I would turn some of the logistics of finding a sponsor over to the universe, I would also do my share and start opening the doors for the opportunity to arrive.  I sent out a few emails stating my intention and asking for help with those in the know.  Specifically I contacted a good friend who works in publishing to see what tips she could give me on finding a publisher to buy my new program…in exchange for a nice sum to sponsor my 6 month sabbatical …or, universe if you’re listening, which I know you are, I’m not limiting the options and would accept a longer monetary sponsorship as well!  I now have the name of an agent, guidelines to prepare a book proposal, and…more work ahead of me.  But I’m willing to invest some time in the short term to receive my big pay off in the long term – though not too long term, mind you.  And that’s the part I’m really turning over to the universe…making the plan become a new reality.

I had my wake up call, put on my creative thinking cap, created a plan, and put it into motion.  Not bad considering my aha came at 6:30 am today and it’s now 3:05 pm.  And the best part is that I know this course of action is right.  How?  Because yesterday my left neck went into spasm with lots of pain and I was stressed and mildly anxious about my practice.  Today, after I had my aha, the tension was gone, the pain was gone (though I admit the 40 minutes of yoga last night helped), and I feel light, energized, and happy again.  When I’m aligned, I feel great!  And when I feel great, I know I’m on the right path.

Are your actions and your energy lining up so that you feel blissfully alive?  Tell me how!

10 Easy Steps to Re-frame a Belief

Last week I was sharing an aha moment around re-framing a belief I discovered that wasn’t serving me.  As part of my process to shift that belief, I created a new statement that I felt honored and reflected my truth better.  Instead of seeing challenges in life I created the space for interesting twists and turns.  I also chose to go through the journey with comfort and ease instead of an uncomfortable stretching. 

Here’s what last week’s statement was for my new belief:

“I am open to expanding my life and living my fullest truth while accepting the opportunities and exploring the interesting twists and turns as they arise with comfort and ease.”

Do you have a belief statement you’re in the process of re-framing?  Try this 10 step process:

1. Write out your current belief.  You can use a friend or a coach to help identify the belief and, more importantly, the energy underneath the belief and decide what is serving you and what isn’t.
2. Re-frame the belief by writing a new statement of belief that focuses on the aspects that are serving you. 
3. Add in new words or thoughts as well to the re-framed statement to create the full picture of what you want.
4. Let it sit for a couple days or a week without consciously thinking about it.
5. Re-visit your statement.  Write it out again.  Read it out loud.  See how it feels.
6. Make any changes to refine the statement so it feels right to you. 
7. Post the statement and read it and say it out loud each day – consciously connecting to the energy of the belief.
8. At the end of the week, see what is showing up in your life from the belief.  Do you like the results?
9. If you aren’t 100% happy with what you’re attracting, go back to step one and start again to uncover and refine what doesn’t feel in alignment.
10. Continue the process as long as you need.

Today I’m on step 5 of the process with my new belief statement.   As I wrote the statement out  to post and focus on regularly, I realized that something felt slightly off.  As I read the statement back, I picked up on a couple items I wanted to change.  First, I was accepting opportunities that had twists and turns.  Originally I was holding onto the idea that life does bring opportunities but I could allow them to be interesting instead of challenging.  However, although I do want to be open to receiving fabulous things in my life, I decided that I don’t need to define them as opportunities and certainly don’t need to limit my journey to having twists and turns.  I also realized that, while I love being a curious explorer and enjoy expansion, that I didn’t need to limit my journey to always exploring…which has a very active, intentionally guided, and slightly controlling energy feel to me.  By staying connected to the active energy I feel I was always had to be in charge.  Instead, I want to simply be and receive my abundance at times, knowing that I have my things to do and then can turn the rest over to the universe.

To accept this new energy, I created this new statement. 

“I am open to expanding, receiving, and living my Infinite truth and abundance with comfort, ease, and lightness of spirit along my life’s journey.”

Our Messages Are All Around

I have been amazed at what has been showing up in my life this past week with such aligned synchronicty.  You see, I know well the theory about how what we focus on is what we attract.  And sometimes I consciously am focusing on things to attract.  But more often than not, it is what I am unconsciously focused on with my energy that amazes me when it shows up. 

I shouldn’t be amazed by the power of unconscious thought energy.  After all, a main part of my coaching is based on helping people bring greater consciousness to their habits and patterns precisely so they can be consciously creating rather than having stuff fall into their lives like unwanted surprises.  So while I’m not surprised by what my unconscious thoughts have been drawing this week, it is a great opportunity and reminder for me to look clearly at what I’m creating and see if I I like it.   And this week, I do like what’s showing up!

So what has been showing up?   The main message that is coming through loud and clear from every imaginable source is that thoughts have incredible power and the ability to understand and utilize this power makes anything possible.   This message came through in my daughter’s seventh grade play, “A Wrinkle in Time” as the main character Meg discovers that tapping into her love for her brother and confidence in her self will free her brother from the Black Thing and bring her family back together safely.  This message came through in the play I saw with my kids this weekend called “The Never Ending Story.”  The boy here not only saves the universe of Fantastico from The Nothing ( the void that comes when people stop hoping and dreaming and thinking) by believing he can step into the book but then also gets to re-create Fantastico from scratch just by envisioning what he wants.  And this message also came through the book I shared I was reading, “Evolve Your Brain” in which this chiropractor completely rehabilitates himself from multiple spinal fractures within 10 weeks without surgery or any medical intervention.

Again, the message itself is not new to me.  However, I’m realizing that maybe I didn’t fully, deeply, with all my heart believe it.  Because what I feel now is complete conviction, utter trust in this truth, and so much excitement that I’ve actually had trouble falling asleep the last several nights as my mind has been buzzing with all the possibilities I want to explore and create.  The message may not always be new, but the intensity and the energy of it can certainly expand and grow…and what a difference that can make it how you feel and move foward in your journey!

What’s showing up in the messages all around you?

An Aha Moment in Clarifying Challenges and Oopportunities

I had a session with my coach today.  Yes, I too, use coaching to support myself and my expansion.  Currently I am doing mentor coaching as part of a coaching accreditation process.  Today, however, I needed a personal moment.

I have been feeling a little frazzled this week.  My heater went out.  My office is in transition.  I have several projects underway.  And I am exploring technology options for my business, a process that sometimes makes my head spin!  Part of the coaching process is to clear whatever might be up that needs to be released before starting the actual coaching…and boy was I clearing these current challenges.  Amidst the clearing, the opportunity arose to focus the session on what was happening for me rather than on the mentor coaching process…and I took it.

My focus to explore today became: how to balance staying in the positive and connected with my flowing energy of my truth and still acknowledge, hear, and clear what shows up in life…these challenges that somehow keep appearing.  Along today’s journey, I realized several important beliefs.  The first is that I do expect life to have ripples, bumps in the road, challenges.  I don’t expect life to flow smooth in a continuous line.  My first choice was whether that belief is true for the nature of life and true for me.  And my answer for today is that I do expect life to have some interesting twists and turns.  However, I made the decision to hold them as “interesting twists and turns” instead of “bumps, ripples, and challenges.”  A subtle word difference but big in how the energy of it feels to me. 

The second belief that came up was that expanding, growing and learning need to have a stretching and challenging component to them.  I had accepted that not only was life full of learning opportunities but they existed within  the challenges (old wording).  That to make a diamond, there needs to be pressure.  That life’s biggest lessons come through our darkest times.  Although I do know that I have the strength, caliber and grace to deal with the challenges and have been holding the positive and powerful space to go through these challenges, I was given the pause today to see if I really wanted to continue to hold the belief  that it has to be a challenge.   Do I want to hold that I need constant challenges, bumps, and ripples in order to learn and expand?  NO! 

I realized that the above statements about growth and challenges are part of a cultural expectation and authority expectation that was taught to me and I had unconsciously agreed to…but I don’t have to hold that belief.  Even as recently as this past year, I was hearing from a marketing mentor that the idea of being in a flow state involves a space of discomfort, of stretching.  That being an entrepreneur means being constantly in the state of discomfort because we are reaching up and above in order to grow.  This is very different than how I feel about flow.  For me, flow is being in intimate connection with my infinite self and alignment and it is so easy, I’m so on, life is flowing.  I am not stretching or feeling discomfort.

These pauses and realizations provided the perfect space to reframe these beliefs that aren’t serving me.  I’m a big believer of creating belief statements which express the energy that I value and is in alignment with my truth.  I use these statements to reframe an old idea and look at it and read it daily to create a new pathway of thinking until it becomes an autonomic belief.  For today, the new statement I came up with is “I am open to expanding my life and living my fullest truth while accepting the opportunities and exploring the interesting twist and turns as they arise with comfort and ease.”

I’ll let you know how it feels over the next days and weeks.  However, I can tell you now, that simply having the Aha and creating the new statement made me feel light, lifted a load off my chest, and put a smile on my face.  And for today, which is all I have right now, it’s perfect!

What do you need to clarify in a moment of pause?

How Far Can Your Beliefs Expand

I am fascinated by neuroplasticity.   Neuro refers to the brain and plasticity refers to the ability to change.  For a long time, up until as recently as about 20 years ago, the belief was that the brain couldn’t change past a certain age.  This was a belief touted by the expert scientists and accepted by the majority of people which is reflected in the saying, “you can’t teach an old dog new tricks.”  However, I am excited to say that the truth has been brought to light that indeed, you can change not only your mind and beliefs but that you can also literally change your brain itself and how it functions.

I love this idea for two reasons.  One is that it opens up to door to new possibilities which I’m all about.  It releases you from being stuck in old patterns and instead allows on you to start wherever you are at and begin again.  This is part of the foundation of coaching…that you do have the power within yourself to re-examine where you are at, to release the old restrictions, and to move boldy into the present now as who you really want to be.

The second thing I like about this new reality is that truly, the sky or universe is the limit.  History has shown over and over again that what we think we know or take as reality or truth in one space or time doesn’t necessarily hold true for the future.  Just because we don’t have the answers today, doesn’t mean we won’t be discovering them tomorrow.  Which gives me even more of a sense of empowerment…that we do have the resources and knowledge to heal ourselves, to expand our inner tools and gifts, to be in alignment with ourselves and each other.  And from that belief I step into my meditation space and open up to receiving more of who I am on the infinite level. 

Around all of this is the space I hold is that there is always a possibility, always a YES or an AND to bring into my relationships and my life.  To anchor in this energy, I recently added an element to my tatoo (which serves as a totem of my core truth) of the infinity sign with the words Sat Nam in the two loops.  Sat Nam means “truth is your identity” and it reflects the idea of infinite truth.

Where are your beliefs and how are they showing up for you in life?

Inspiring Resources

I was recently listening to a teleclass between James Roche and David Neagle while taking a walk.  I love to use “down time” to listen to inspiring material.  I do this while cooking, while cleaning the house, while walking by myself  when I don’t need ponder time.  This technique creates a win-win situation…I can find time that I wouldn’t normally have to listen to uplifting things, and I enjoy mundane activities more by doing this.  It’s great self care for me.

Anyway, back to the teleclass.  David Neagle, who is a prominent life coach with a rags to riches story, was talking about two critical elements he discovered early on in his journey that were breakthrough tools to his moving forward.  The first was an internal shift that he sums up as “change your attitude”.  He recognized that a stumbling block, at that time, was his current attitude and beliefs.  He had been told to change his attitude by others but at some point it became an “internal aha” that clicked.  And changing his attitude was key.  Just in changing his attitude, his behaviors began to shift and he opened up to receive new opportunities in his life. 

He reinforced this shift by modeling the behavior of someone who held the picture of success that he was looking for.  And this was his second element to moving forward powerfully…finding mentors who can shorten your learning curve by not having to re-create the wheel.   He used growth seminars then coaches but one could use many different things as a mentor.

Both of these elements…aligning your beliefs to serve who you want to be today and finding resources to achieve those goals…are things I not only live but also offer up to my clients.  And one tool that I use to achieve both is Kundalini yoga.  Yoga may not on the surface look like a mentor because it’s not a particular person, at least not for me since I don’t have a single guru.  However, the teachings as a whole in Kundalini yoga offers a road map to living a life of healing and harmony that has been invaluable to me.  It is 5,000 year old, time tested technology and I see it working everyday in my life.  It is powerful and quick in transforming outdated patterns and is the single greatest element I have found that has transformed my life in huge ways.  The mantras and meditations also serve to expand my beliefs and align my mental beliefs with my higher truth.

What resources do you use to inspire and transform?  Taking a moment to reflect on this question can in itself me an important step on your journey.  As you explore this question, you might also be inspired to discover new resources to support yourself.

Watching What You Say

I know the power of words.  And even before the words, I know how powerful thoughts are.  I tell my clients this often and following the thread of words is a technique I have clients do to see what patterns they are unconsciously creating.  So with all that I know and teach, one might think that I have perfected my use of thoughts and words.  Wrong!  Living in alignment with my truth and in health and harmony is a practice that I, too, strive to expand each day.

Which is why I was so tickled when I got a gentle reminder from the universe this past week about just this…watching what I say.  The story goes that I was looking for a shoji screen for my yoga space.  I found one on Craig’s List but it had a stand and was more than I was wanting to pay.  However, instead of negotiating with the seller or being mindful of the words I was using, I just kept repeating that “I don’t need a stand so why should I pay for it.”  That was the sentance as a whole, but the piece that kept running through my mind, in my attempt to not focus on scarcity and money, was “I don’t need a stand.”

I had initially made an appointment to look at the screen and possibly purchase it, but realized I would need my van, which I didn’t have, so I cancelled.  Then, because I was feeling conflicted, I did nothing.    Until today, that is, when I finally decided to take action because I do want a darn screen.  And I had even decided that a stand might be handy, provide options and offer flexibity.  So I popped onto Craig’s List only to discover…yes, you guessed it…the screen was gone!  I told the universe I didn’t want a stand, and the universe took care of it. 

That’s the problem with practicing.  I’ve gotten quite good and the universe tends to act fast…no time to mess around with indecision.  But that’s ok.  I still bought a screen and got a great reminder of keeping my clarity attennae up high to make sure what I’m thinking and saying are truly what I want.

TIP: Instead of saying, “I can’t afford it” substitute “I’m choosing to spend my resources differently.”   Try it and see what you notice, both in terms of what shows up in your life and also in how the energy feels between the two statements.  Then let me know!