Finding my “Best” With Waking Up
I have been exploring my balance with when to wake up for the past year. This may sound like a no-brainer…wake up when the body says to or when one has to get up. However, ever since I did my yoga teacher training in which the expectation was set out that not only is it ideal to wake up 1-2 hours before sunrise, but that it’s also ideal to do a specified 2.5 hours of yoga and meditation, I have been exploring my truth in waking.
During my teacher training, I pretty much adhered to the yogic ideal for waking early though I did not hold strictly to the 2.5 hours of the Aquarian yoga set…and felt good starting my day in such a fashion. However, I also noticed that I was stressed about this waking process, so much so that I would have restless sleep, disturbed dreams, and a conscious level of resistance. In the past year I have been exploring what this resistance is about. I let go of the expectation to get up at a specified time and allowed myself to do my yoga whenever it felt right during the day. I recognized that with my ongoing output of energy for my business expansion, my expectation for yoga was becoming another “to do” item on my list rather than a joyful celebration and self connection.
In releasing myself from the yogic expectation, my stress level around yoga and waking did go down. However, not only did I find myself doing less consistent yoga, but I also noticed that I have been slipping into a pattern of over-sleeping which has me feeling groggy and lethargic. It’s almost as if I’ve gone too far in the opposite direction in reaction to the initial expectation.. I feel like a child flaunting my independence - rebelling with behaviors that don’t really serve me but send a message that I’m in charge. And I now have a message when my body naturally wakes me around 4:30-5:30 that I don’t want to get up and don’t have to. I have slipped into resistance as a habit!
To try to bring myself back to a neutral ground, I have decided to do another experiment. For the next 40 days (I started this morning), I’m going to get up daily at 5 am or whenever my body wakes naturally around that time. This is to try to re-set my timing back to it’s natural state and play with the ideal yogic time. Yet, I’m going to honor myself each day in the moment I am by listening to what I want to do once I wake up. Rather than having a specific expectation of doing X amount of yoga and meditation and exercise, I’m going to listen to my BodyMind and see what I need. I’m going to practice being the neutral observer and simply notice what’s happening for me.
No surprise but last night I dreamt about getting up and woke several times. I finally got up 15 minutes before my alarm was set to go off. I rode my bike for 20 minutes being mindful that I was sore in strange places from my 3.5 hours of yard work yesterday. I did a lovely yoga set at half time, also listening to my lower levels of energy. And now I’m peacefully doing a couple things on the computer before I go to do some cooking to support myself for the day. I feel good. If I set aside the mental stumbling block I’ve unintentionally created, I welcome the idea of waking early and being able to enjoy these peaceful moments before the kids wake and the busy day starts.
For today, I am trying to hold the AND of these energies…the guideline for waking early for ideal health with honoring my best in each moment as I listen to what I need and am capable of. For today, I’m liking it!
Tags: best, expectations, health, listening, sleep
BodyMind Coaching | admin | 
May 4, 2009 4:40 am
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