Growing Up

I put my 13 year-old daughter on a plane today to Florida by herself.  She’s off to stay with her Argentinian aunt to practice her Spanish.  As I stood there saying a quick good-bye this morning at the gate, I reflected on how much she has grown and blossomed over the years and how fast she is growing up.

To me, parenting is the most challenging experience I’ve ever had.  It has all the makings of a great epic saga…the ups, the downs, the drama, the lessons on both sides, and even the budding romance (which we haven’t hit yet but I’m sure it’s on it’s way!).  Unlike coaching where I hold a neutral space and allow clients to discover their own best answers, as a parent I definitely do more guiding and laying down the laws.  As my daughter is getting older, though I will obviously still hold the “parent” space, I am hoping to give her more of the opportunity to discover her own best answers.  Sometimes there’s an overlap…her choices blended with seeds I have unconsciously or consciously planted.

This trip was my daughter’s idea…a counter proposal to my offer to send her to a language camp this summer.  She has expressed interest to be an exchange student and we both thought she needed a bit more skill before heading off for a summer.  Recognizing that she doesn’t like going to camps or being in strange places, she chose an opportunity for herself which met her goals and honored her comfort levels.  The seeds for this trip, however, began with my own passion for travel.  We’ve had the opportunity to go to Europe three times (my mother and her husband have lived in Germany 7 of the past 10 years) and we hosted a French exchange student and a Spanish exchange chaperone.  I’m excited that she shares my wanderlust and is open to expanding her horizons through learning about other cultures.  I don’t think I push but I certainly encourage and support the experiences she chooses to explore.

With each experience, I see her grow into her name…Grace.  Last year she stayed in Germany with my mother an additional three weeks after my son and I departed.  It was not all roses for her, though it had been her choice.  But that experience, with it’s challenges, allowed her to step onto the plane this morning with a new level of confidence that I can’t help but admire.

Here’s to the next generations…may they carry the best of us with their own unique skills born of this time in society.